Dear Ladies

         Okay girls, this has gone on long enough.  You've had your chance.  Today is leap day, which rolls around once every 1460 days and is the only day where the laws of the cosmos turn their back and for a period of 24 hours, women are allowed to throw a man to the ground, present him with a mangagement ring, and demand that he marries you before he can get up again.

         Don't think that I'm oblivious to the fact that there are scads of you of the fairer sex who have been waiting for today to arrive like tweens in line for a Justin Bieber concert.  I know that the thought of being
able to propose to me is enough to make most of you fall swooning onto your fainting couch, petticoats aflutter; and perhaps all the swooning is the reason that so far today I have not been proposed to ONE SINGLE TIME!  Not once!  I mean for pete's peppers girls at the risk of being redundant I must stress that THIS IS YOUR CHANCE!  Do you want to let this slip by and go back to your routine of pining for me day and night, knowing full well that you had 24 hours to pop the question?  Do you?  DO YOU?!

You've got one shot Miss Leap Year

          Granted, I must concede that the thought of proposing to someone who in all likelyhood doesn't know you from Mother Eve may be daunting.  And yes, it is true, I'm prepared to answer no to every single one of you.  But that's the whole point!

          According to sacred tradition dating aback to the 5th century, if the man rejects you he is obligated to buy you 12 pairs of gloves.  So it's a clear win-win for you, dudettes.  I sure as heck didn't pay $49.99 for this pallet of disposable latex gloves so I could sit at home all dang day waiting for you lady-folk to muster the guts to call.  And who knows, maybe you're the one for me and I'll say yes.

         So how 'bout it Dimples?  You've got 24 hours.  Think of all the stuff that Jack Bauer got done in 24 hours.  You've been waiting for this all your life; the choice is yours lady-loves.  Just be quick about it because I don't answer the door after 9 PM on Leap Days.  That's when the Leaplings come out with their freaky leap powers like crazy, mutant Zaboomafoos.

Happy Leap day everyone.  Or as some people would like it to be called, Rare Diseases Day.  I'm not so hot on that myself, but to show that I'm all about equal opportunity holidays, check out one of my favorite rare diseases, Blue Person Disease http://www.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~kyperry3/Blue_Fugates_Troublesome_Creek.html

Google'd 'evil lemur'.  Actually
found something.  Mind blown.